Bonnie Kaye`s Straight Talk Newsletter
Contents
1. Bonnie Kaye s Straight Talk Newsletter DECEMBER 2012 Volume 12 Issue 137 Bonnie s Mantras LIFE WAS NEVER MEANT TO BE THIS COMPLICATED PERIOD YOU CAN T FIX A BROKEN MAN BUT HE CAN BREAK YOU Help support Bonnie s mission to help women and men in pain Purchase her books from her website at www Bonniekayebooks com Her newest book can be purchased at www Dysfunctionalmen com JOIN ME ON TWITTER Bonniekaye1 HOUSTON HEALING WEEKEND MARCH 2 3 2013 Our next healing weekend will take place in Houston on March 2nd and 3rd Our Texas women are dynamic and strong Women from other parts of the country will also be joining this dynamic weekend where we unite to get stronger If you are interested in joining me for this dynamic weekend send me a note with the word Houston in the subject and will add you to the list for details as we progress A SHORT HOLIDAY MESSAGE Okay Let s start the newsletter with a short holiday message For many of you the holidays will be the horrible days or in some cases the horror days There is just no way around it won t tell you to be grateful for what you have and not worry about the rest of your life that feels like you are lost in a typhoon can give you all kinds of encouraging words and positive affirmations but they probably won t mean much So here s my short holiday message for you Big hugs am sorry if you are suffering The holidays only make bad things seem worse2. This Alarm Clock DVR captures video at an impressive 640 x 480 resolution at 30 FPS in AVI format Still pictures are captured at 1280 x 960 resolution in JPEG format Simply connect the clock to your computer with the included USB cable to upload your videos and photos FREE 4GB SD CARD Included Some of the spyware is more expensive but it costs far less than hiring a private detective that may find absolutely nothing because your husband is overly cautious Some of the more expensive products include mirrors you can now do smoke and mirrors clocks fire alarms and air freshener containers Mega Security also offers wonderful items to protect yourself On my page Catch Him you will also find a link to the security products These include pepper spray alarms and even stun guns For many of you being on your own can be scary These products can make you feel more secure Kevin will be my guest on my Straight Wives Talk Show this Sunday evening at 10 p m EST He will discuss the products and how user friendly they are and what you can do with them If you miss the show live tune into the podcast at www Blogtalkradio com and type in Straight Wives Talk Show 12 16 12 Here is the link you can cut and paste into your browser if you prefer http www blogtalkradio com bonnielkaye 201 2 1 2 17 straight wives talk show CLASSIC ARTICLES For the holiday season would like to share two of my past favorite articles with you Even if yo
3. But on the bright side you don t have to do it alone have lots of support available to anyone who needs it during this difficult time I m only a click away I ll have support chat on Christmas and New Year s Eves and throughout the week Sometimes just knowing others can understand your pain makes a whole big difference MY NEW BOOK VENTURE CALLING ALL VOLUNTEERS As reflect over the past year try to see if there is any kind of pattern to the letters receive for help They certainly haven t decreased in the past 12 months if anything they have increased On any given day receive between 5 20 letters asking for help and support The stories are all sad They are all different but they are also all the same The one trend do see is the number of women who are stuck in the muck because their husbands refuse to confess These are bright women They have good instincts They are writing to me for help so they have some sense of what the problem is tell women who write to me in doubt that if gay wasn t the issue they wouldn t be writing to me They would be writing to Dear Abby or Ann Landers Trust me I m not in their league when it comes to advice to 1 the lovelorn at least the lovelorn of straight women married to straight men However do pat myself on the back for being the voice of sanity to my women married to gay men The funny thing is that some women actually have found proof They have discovered it on
4. Note the photos show 2 tenacity cards by mistake switched out one for persevere The lavender painted wooden box measures 2 3 4 x 2 3 4 x 1 1 4 and is fitted with brass hardware There is atiny 1 1 2 x 1 1 2 inset collage on the top of the box this one has a pretty floral image on a vintage postcard It is also accented by a tiny ornate brass key a favorite symbol of mine There is pretty fabric ribbon trim and 4 iridescent lavender crystals At this hliday time of the year treat yourself to some beautiful jewelry by going to Maureen s Etsy site Here is the link you can paste into your browser http www etsy com shop MaureenTillman page 1 Happy holidays to all the women and men who are part of my network have some wonderful radio shows scheduled for this month This week is Kevin from Mega Security Next week my show will feature Patsy Rae Dawson our dynamo Christian marriage counselor who explains why the Bible says divorce is fine in our situation And for the week between Christmas and New Year s we will have a wonderful hour with our own Dr Brian Hooper who is so comforting to all of us To hear the shows live just go to www Blogtalkradio com and type in Straight Wives Talk Show Live shows are Sunday nights at 10 p m EST You can listen any time after the show airs as well Talking about the show my dear friend Debbie Thomas Brown who runs the group South Florida Connects to help women and men married to gay
5. Ten healing words to touch your heart and empower your spirit that interchange on the 1 inch x 1 inch brass pendant tray when you need the inspiration or encouragement Pendant tray is suspended by a 24 inch brass chain The tiny sturdy collaged words attach to the tray with _ velcro The ten words in this _ collection are conquer relief empathy courage listen persevere compassion tenacity _ cherish and create Note the photos show a tenacity that had to switch out with mindful The pretty pink painted wooden box measures 2 3 4 x 2 3 4 x 1 1 4 and is fitted with brass hardware There is a tiny 1 1 2 x 1 1 2 inset collage on the top of the box this one has a collection vintage postcards It is also accented by a tiny brass key a favorite symbol of mine There is pretty fabric ribbon trim and 4 large iridescent pink crystals m4 bi ek ch i Bae E a LP ETER A You can order this from this link http www etsy com listing 1 16855038 healing art necklace ten pendants one Ten healing words to touch your heart and empower your spirit that interchange on the 1 inch x 1 inch T copper pendant tray when you need the inspiration or encouragement Pendant tray is suspended by a 24 inch copper chain The tiny sturdy collaged words attach to the tray with velcro The ten words in this collection are tenacity endure inspire journey truth awake awareness breathe tenderness play and persevere
6. car or in your home when you re not there and any conversations will be picked up There are also audio cameras where you can see activity as well Some of these products are costly but others are certainly inexpensive enough Just to give you an idea Digital Voice Telephone Recorder with MP3 Player Function Price 43 00 Product Description There are many reasons why conversations may need to be recorded and using the latest technology will allow users to do so with convenience and speed With our audio recorder you can record phone or room conversations Digital recordings can be played replayed and recorded over without a loss in recording quality These recorders have a voice activation feature which saves hours by only recording when sound is detected This model provides both telephone and room recording This voice recorder can record up to 864 hours in long play mode It s simple and easy to use FO CG DVR What I love about this product is that you can slip it under the seat of his car or anywhere in a room where he talks on the phone The cost is only 43 00 You can t beat that Pen Hidden Video Camera with Mini DVR Price 34 00 Product Description This PEN HIDDEN CAMERA plus audio is a super small camera with a mini DVR to record all the action It even writes like a normal pen No drivers or outside power source needed It will charge when it is plugged into the computer Perfect camera for body wor
7. is it The desire for a penis is always there All bi men would automatically fall under the Number 2 category Even men who are just fantasizing about other men would be in the Number 2 group After all if a man gets aroused by a penis it s definitely the Number 2 category think the Bonnie Kaye Scale will help women make easier decisions You don t have to sit and debate anything at all It all comes down to one question do you want a man who wants a woman or a man who has a penis on his mind Why does something this simple have to become so complicated June 2008 THE P WORD As my long time readers know DENIAL is a very powerful thing That s why so many of our women linger in relationships long after they should seeking the TRUTH while wasting years of their lives that can never be returned l m not quite sure why so many of the women who come from me have to have POSITIVE proof before taking action to end their marriages to gay men always give them my standard line of Look for the symptoms and you ll eventually find the disease bringing toxicity to your marriage or Look for the clues and you ll evidentially find the evidence try to relate it to medical and legal terminology to make it simple And yet women want so badly to believe that the worst is not the worst but rather some mistaken moment of stupidity weakness boredom mid life crisis past sexual abuse issues resurf
8. acing and so on and so on Here s the funny thing These women come to me looking for the truth but when give it to them straight they don t want to hear it It s like need to be challenged at least once a week by some woman who will insist that her situation won t be like the other ones write about After all her husband has always been so good so honest such a good friend you know the story These women are way beyond swimming down the river of De Nile they are building a Mountain of DENIAL send them directly to those other groups on the Internet who sit and complain while they figure out why life is so much better living with a Bi man than with No man One woman sent me an interesting thought After gathering information about her husband s homosexuality and confronting him he replied I m not gay l m straight with problems Wow a new category Now could add that to the A sexual Bi Sexual Metro sexual Limbo and Straight Gay Man categories that are taking up a lot of my mental time explaining to women but I ve come up with my new terminology that will stop men from having to pick and choose which column of the menu they are on at any given year or what rung they are standing on of the Kinsey scale while they are scaling up and down between 1 and 6 From now on we can call these men Penis Men It s so simple it s not a choice of where a man is but rather of what he wants We don t have to use tha
9. book when it s completed hopefully by the spring Please email me at Bonkaye aol com and put in the subject box New Book EXCITING NEW SPYWARE HEAR THE COMPUTER RADIO SHOW ON 12 16 12 admit it takes a lot to make me feel really excited but am and think you will be too For a number of years women have been trying to check up on their husbands computer activities Sadly many of these husbands know how to erase everything or lock up their computer so you ll find nothing This goes back to my point of women having to suffer much longer than necessary because they have no proof That s why was so excited when a spyware company sent me some information about their products knew this was going to be a great match because the company was right here in my hometown After viewing their products became so excited called Kevin the director and asked to meet with him know he thought that was pretty odd because people normally don t ask that However told him that if am going to put my name on the line of recommending a product have to make sure know that it is reliable Kevin and met several weeks ago and was AMAZED The products he has can be found on my www Gayhusbands com website under the tab Catch Him When the link comes up just hit into the menu bar above all of the products and they will drop down What s amazing about these products is that they are voice activated That means you can leave them in a
10. ey dread the thought of being labeled as gay due to societal or religious pressures They enjoy the security of living with a woman in a heterosexual lifestyle where they don t have to fear the rejection of their families religions and communities However this does not deserve a space on the ladder climbing up to homosexuality on the Kinsey Scale think the Kinsey Scale is an excuse for people who can t accept their sexuality believe that some gay men can perform sex with heterosexual women when the emotional need is so great that they can talk themselves into it And believe that these men feel much better talking themselves into being a 2 or 3 on that scale rather than a 4 5 or 6 That scale convinces many a man that he s okay staying in a marriage because he s not a 6 The Kinsey Scale is a product from 50 years ago believe it needs to be updated and simplified So now I ve come up with a Bonnie Kaye Scale of Sexuality The scale has two levels Number 1 and Number 2 Number 1 is Heterosexual This is a man who craves sex only with a woman because these are the only sexual feelings that arouse him Number 2 is for all the other men who desire a penis on any level incidentally occasionally every blue moon just out of curiosity or in a fantasy Think of all of the anguish this new scale will take away from people who are intellectualizing about where they stand on
11. n applications Just click it like you would any ball point pen to start recording It can record for a full two hours on a single charge Recordings can be later downloaded via high speed USB 2 0 to your PC for viewing and storing You can even use it as a thumb drive to move files from one computer to another Will hold 2 GB of files Supports Windows 98 98SE 2000 XP VISTA and Linux auto identifies the operating system installs related drivers no need to manually install except Windows 98 Features Ball point pen shape with both video audio recorder and highly sensitive microphone can record the audio clearly in the range of 15 feet working ball point pen with exchangeable standard ball point refill suitable for any computer and other equipment with USB 2 0 Standard port no need of drivers and external power supply Infrared LED Flashlight Hidden Camera with DVR and Laser Pointer Price 84 00 Product Description This is an Infrared Led Flashlight Hidden Spy Camera It is the perfect tool for those who want to see what secret things are going on in the dark This item is great for security guards police hunters and anyone with low light recording needs The camera lens is located in the center of the Flashlight It has a unique design very easy to use and is multi functional The 8 GB Micro SD Card ensures long time recording The Infrared LED flashlight is small and compact so it can be concealed easily as well Dimensio
12. ns 4 long 1 wide FREE 8GB SD CARD Included Features Audio and video synchronized recording Built in 2 0 Mega pixels high definition digital camera Video resolution 1280 x 960 AVI format Built in Li battery 800 mAh Storage micro SD card up to 32 GB Image Sensor 1 4 CMOS View Angle 70 Video Resolution 1280 x 960 pixels Photo Resolution 1600 x 1200 pixels Recording Frame 30 fps Video working time about 5 hours LED Video synchronal working time about 3 hours Charging time 3 hours working current 30 mA Includes IR LED Flashlight DVR USB Cable CD User Manual 8 GB Micro SD Card Mini Digital Color Alarm Clock DVR Cost 56 00 gt oS m Product Description Cx The Mini Digital Alarm Clock DVR is the ultimate hidden camera digital video recorder Hide this amazing camera in plain sight since it s cleverly disguised as a fully functional alarm clock This hidden camera is perfect for secret video surveillance like keeping an eye on your home checking up on employees or your kids It has a variety of recording options including video and audio audio only still photo motion detector and works as a web cam The 2200mA lithium battery is capable of recording for up to 12 hours on a single charge With the included 4GB micro SD card this camera can store up to 2 hours of constant recording In motion detection mode the recording is only active when movement takes place saving battery and storage space
13. spouses will start hosting her show on my Straight Wives Talk Show Her shows will air on Thursday evenings at 8 p m EST Debbie reaches out to minority women especially from the islands She will be our guest in January Love to all of you Bonnie 10
14. t ghastly G word anymore we can use the trendier and more upscale P word If a man is thinking about it viewing male porno sites fantasizing about it or actually acting on it he s a P Man It sounds more honest than Bisexual and gives no false hope that he s going to want you a woman more one day than he does a man P Men sort of sound like that Elton John song Rocket Man We can even change the words to our cause And think it s gonna be a long long time Till touching down there brings me round again to find I m not the man they think am at home Oh no no no l m a Penis Man Penis man burning out his fuse out there alone Since Elton John is an open P Man maybe he won t mind too much if adapted those lyrics for the future Bottom line for our women if he s a P Man you know that means he s a G man But we ll let him think he s just a P THIS MONTH S FEATURED HEALING JEWELRY For the past two months I ve been featuring some of the beautiful jewelry created by my support network friend Maureen Tillman Maureen creates beautiful pieces using words that truly inspire Maureen has brought back my favorite of her creations because you have the choice to wear any one of these beautiful words by interchanging them with Velcro have had my original one for three years and still wear them also have used the little miniature box to keep little beads in that treasure Here are two of the new ones
15. the Kinsey Scale Think of all the worry they could avoid as they inch up the ladder and move from a 2 to a 3 or a4 to a6 can t even imagine the fear a man would have who is on Number 4 and creeping up to Number 5 Does he sit and worry how long it is going to take him to get to number 6 Will he try to convince himself to have sex with a woman so he can downslide to number 3 like the idea of my scale so much better Men don t have to sit and worry about how gay they are or will be They have nothing to prove if they desire sex more with men It won t change their number they will still be a Number 2 Wow wouldn t that take the pressure off of men who are trying so hard to fight their own gay desires and behavior And wouldn t it make things so much easier for our women also Women wouldn t have to wonder if their husbands boyfriends are moving up or down a scale It would be much more black or white If you want a heterosexual man that s fine If he s anything else well it s not fine at least not fine for a marriage We could eliminate the fallacy of Bisexuality or Number 3 on the Kinsey Scale which always gives false hope to women Bi implies to women that they have an equal chance to win their man as a man has which we know is not the case It reinforces false hope that if they love their men enough or try harder to be better wives girlfriends their men will pick them It just ain t happening
16. the computer cell phones charge cards and porno collections And yet their husbands get angry feel insulted and turn the tables on their wives This is when the gaylighting to make you think you are crazy starts to kick in What are you nuts Why would you think would look at gay porn on the computer It must belong to the kids Or when they are caught going to a gay bar I m allowed to have friends don t check on my friends sexuality before we become friends So have a few drinks with them in the gay bar That just means I m self confident about my own sexuality not that I m gay Okay Whatever We always say that hindsight is 20 20 want to put a book together with all of the 20 20 s we ve missed in our marriages to help other women so they won t be plindsided My new book will be called Gay Husbands Say the Darndest Things It will include little snippets on each page of quotes from you members of my support network which can be used with your first name or whatever name you want or even anonymously It is my hope that women who are hearing the same words that we heard for so long will finally understand that the most ridiculous explanations very simply mean GAY If you are willing to share with others please let me know don t need any long stories here just some examples of craziness that you were told when you suspected your husband and he refused to be honest If you participate in the project you will get a
17. u have read them before you can enjoy them again because they are still so relevant The first article addresses The Kinsey Scale which gay men are drawn to because they can justify they aren t gay This was written in October of 2007 The next one was written in June of 2008 Many gay husbands struggle with the word gay or homosexual It is obviously a word that is so difficult for them to say about themselves After all once the words are said it means they will have to deal with it The second article addresses this and gives a better solution The first one is from October 2007 REVISITING and REVISING THE KINSEY SCALE Most of you have heard of the Kinsey Scale Gay men use this as an argument to prove that they are not gay but rather on some road or continuum that never seems to get to where you know they are going or have landed The Kinsey Scale was first devised in 1948 by Dr Alfred Kinsey His research broke sexuality into seven steps starting at Totally heterosexual to Totally Homosexual There were a number of other steps in between According to Kinsey these are the steps 0 Exclusively heterosexual with no homosexual 1 Predominantly heterosexual only incidentally homosexual 2 Predominantly heterosexual but more than incidentally homosexual 3 Equally heterosexual and homosexual 4 Predominantly homosexual but more than incidentally heterosexual 5 Predominantly homosexual only incidentally heterosex
18. ual 6 Exclusively homosexual According to Kinsey Males do not represent two discrete populations heterosexual and homosexual The world is not to be divided into sheep and goats It is a fundamental of taxonomy that nature rarely deals with discrete categories The living world is a continuum in each and every one of its aspects This scale has widely been accepted and utilized by many professionals in the field look at this scale as being an excuse for gay men as a way to prove that they are not gay and regularly see it being used to that end Quite frankly don t understand this whole concept For instance what is the difference between the Number 1 and the Number 2 position on the Kinsey scale Number 1 is Predominantly heterosexual only incidentally homosexual Number 2 is Predominantly heterosexual but more than incidentally homosexual What determines if someone is incidentally or more than incidentally homosexual For that matter what does incidentally mean An incident happened one day or night And how is a man predominantly heterosexual but more than incidentally homosexual Hmmm beats me And quite frankly let s skip up to Number 5 on the scale 5 Predominantly homosexual only incidentally heterosexual What does that mean Very confusing isn t it believe that there are men who are emotionally straight They are unable to come to terms with the gay world Th
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